Photo Personals

Interesting and cool date ideas!

2007-02-21T11:29:00.000+01:00

Going out for dinner and a movie is undoubtedly one of the most popular dates couples experience. However, it is also one of the very worst -- especially for couples who are early in the dating stage. I'll explain why those dates are potentially harmful to your relationship and how you can plan a far more creative date with less money.

Find out more to discover dozens of dates that are perfect for long distance relationships. There are dates specifically for celebrating the season, birthdays, anniversaries and other special occasions. You will find super inventive picnic date ideas and tips on making dinner dates the most creative and romantic imaginable -- without spending a lot of money or time in preparation.

Useful and effective advice for Vacation Dates, Creative Ways to Ask Someone Out and a couple dozen Dating Coupons -- coupons you can give your sweetheart to redeem for future creative dates.

Keep reading and your dates will be so impressed with your dates that they will certainly tell all their friends how romantic and creative you are.

Here are some popular dating ideas for Valentine's Day:

Tie your card or gift on a three foot string and tie it to the bottom of an automatic garage door. When your honey comes home, the gift will magically arise to greet them.
Go to a nearby river or stream and race rubber ducks. The loser takes the winner out for dessert.
While your love is in the shower, put their towel in the dryer for a few minutes so it will be toasty warm when he or she steps out.
In your own voice, record a book, fairy tale or poetry on tape for your dearest to listen to on the way to work or while he or she is out of town.
Move the living room furniture and have a picnic in the middle of the floor complete with blanket, picnic basket and all the fixings (in front of a roaring fireplace would add to the effect).
Sending a card can be explosively romantic just by adding something unexpected: a feather, leaf, matches, lock of your hair, pressed flower or your handkerchief scented with perfume/cologne.
Gently scratch his back for ten minutes while he falls asleep or brush her hair for the same amount of time.

Click here to view all amazing dating ideas on a single website!

English translation of Activ - Visez

2006-07-26T22:17:00.000+02:00

I'm looking for english translation of this nice dance song from Romanian group called Activ - Visez. This is the lyrics of "Visez":

Activ - Visez

Cand te-am vazut intaia oara
Am inteles de ce traiesc
Parca plutesc cand esti cu mine
Nu pot sa incetez sa te privesc
Timpul in loc se opreste
Soarele incet ne topeste
Am ramas fara cuvinte
Nu mai am nici dorinte.

Refren(x2):
Tu esti viata mea
Si as vrea sa stii
Te port cu mine in gand
Orice ar fi
Vezi in ochii mei
Tot ce-ti doresti
Ai vrea sa-mi spui
Ca ma iubesti

2006-07-06T20:50:00.000+02:00

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All my girlfriends were wonderful human beings - beautiful people have it easier because they are beautiful

2006-06-18T21:28:00.000+02:00

Also, when doing an all-out "asking for a dance", some annoying factors might come to play, over which you have very little control owing to the approach you have chosen. She might be tired, waiting for a friend in a designated spot, just doesn't dance, her boyfriend is just around the corner. All these factors really have no bearing should you choose an approach which also incorporates demonstrating value and personality (beyond having the guts to ask for a dance). In which case "waiting for a friend" or "being tired" are quickly out the window... plus some more time with you and the "boyfriend" might share the same route:) But without having been able build rapport with her and make her crave for you, you really don't have too many options - maybe thank her, maybe ask her "how about later?" (yea right) or ask her "mind if I join you for some conversation?", nah, these all suck to high heaven, better just move on to the next girl. Theoretically, you might still stand a chance with her once she sees the girl that was smart enough to agree to dance with you having the time of her life:) But whatever you do, don't stand there and aggravate her by arguing with her as to why she won't dance with you. Forget her, move on, there's a better-looking and smarter girl (for she knows to appreciate your invitation:) right behind her, and YOU are what she's been waiting for all her life:) Or at least this evening:) Group Tactics If She is With a Friend ...also known as disarming the obstacles She is the target. The friend is the obstacle. Be it male a female, so many AFC's make the fatal mistake of ignoring the friend / obstacle when making sweet-talk with the target. An ignored obstacle is pissed and getting more pissed all the time. Undoubtedly, the target's friends have much more influence over her than you could ever exert in 5-10 minutes, which means that when the pissed obstacles will eventually start interfering with your conversation, dragging your target away ("come on, we have to go home / to another place" etc.), talking with your target and ignoring you, making comments and just generally breaking the mood… you're dead meat. If you were good enough to make the target interested in you, she might be able to slip you her number while her friend is already dragging her out the door. But more likely than not, in an atmosphere poisoned by the pissed presence of the obstacle, you'll never have a chance with the target. So now what? The only option is to befriend the obstacles before engaging the target. Make the target's friends - male, female, brothers, co-workers, whatever - your best mates before you move on to working you magic with the one that really drew you to their friendly circle in the first place. Have a good time doing it, make lots of friends, shake hands, be humorous, lift everyone's spirits. Make them laugh, feel good and like you:) Once you're done that, you can move to working your target without having to fear anything from your new-found buddies. Who, by the way, you have already negged by paying the least amount of attention to. This has gotten her intrigued about you as she's probably accustomed to being adored everywhere she goes:) But not by you, so either you're accustomed to beautiful women or there's something about her that you don't like, either way, she has got to find out, she has got to make you adore her, she is so accustomed to that, "why is she not paying attention to me!?", "gotta step up my efforts with this guy!", hehe:) (Don't forget to read Neghits explained and Neghits expansion pack:). One more thing - once you've disarmed the obstacle / obstacles and (37 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] engaged the target, and this is critical, you need to separate her from her friend / friends. If she is with a friend, you better have a wingman to keep the obstacle busy and help in the effort of separating them. Very many girls don't like to be seen kissing or touching someone in front of others / friends. They have the issue of reputation to deal with etc. But once you're in a private place, she's free to do whatever she wants without having to think "oh no, what's my friend going to think about this", "is she gonna tell anyone / my boyfriend / mom?" etc. Let's say you separated two friends, you're with one girl and your wingman with another girl someplace else. You and the girl have no idea what you're your wingman and her girl are doing. But that doesn't mean you can't imagine:) This is where it gets interesting - she's gonna think her friend is probably already making out and having all the fun, maybe even having sex already:) While her friend is probably thinking the same thing:) So being separated and not knowing what the other one is doing, both of them are much more receptive to all sorts of advances:) Applied with a wingman: if your wingman and his girl seem to be getting along, tell your girl (without the other girl overhearing) that you should let those two be alone and leave. Your girl will certainly initially wonder, what you mean by that. "Open her eyes" with these:) - "Are you blind or something? Can't you see what they're up to? Or do you want to watch them:)? Don't you know how embarrassing it is when two people want to be alone and there's someone watching?". This should make her "understand" and now the two of you can leave. But the beauty of this is, that you leave with your girl thinking, that her girlfriend is gonna get some in a few minutes:) The girlfriend however sees the two of you leaving and can't help but think that you left so that you and your girl could go have some private fun:) Now that you've got both of them thinking, that the other one is going to get her brains screwed out in a few moments, neither of them wants to be left out in the cold - voila:)! A simple variation of removing obstacles / negging the target, ASF: "You see HB and UG together - dance/talk/have fun with the UG instead, HB is surprised, jealous and starts making an effort. Perfect." Neghits "A 10 is there surrounded by friends. She has put on this BITCH act. Is she REALLY a bitch? Unlikely. All my girlfriends were wonderful human beings - beautiful people have it easier because they are beautiful and often times have better upbringings because of it. BUT - they need to have a standard with which to uphold when all these NOBODY guys approach her. So her values are very honed and understood. When a man walks up and says, "can I buy you a beer?" she WILL be annoyed by this. While the guy thinks he's doing something nice for her, she gets this ALL the time. She is desensitised to this. You are the 8th guy TODAY! So she is very good at brushing all these guys off. Shit, she HAS to be... she isn't going to sleep with ALL of them! So she may say NO or act annoyed and then the guy thinks she's a bitch and walks off pissed and feeling like a failure. And that seems to work. Sometimes when the girl is particularly in a feeling of control (like in a club where she is PREPARED for the barrage of men - it IS after all something that occurs so often that when it is GONE she MISSES it) she will accept the beer and then flake the guy off. Hey, the guys are stupid enough to buy her one, she might as well take it. When they take a beer from you, the girl is saying to you, "I don't know you and I don't care about you. You are just another one of those typical guys and since I don't respect you, Ill take the beer from you before I snub you." Since a 10 is so GOOD at snuffing your approach (nothing ever personal either - it is a strategy that is built over years of stupid guys approaches EVERY FUCKING DAY, she will do the same to YOU. That is why SNUFFING THEM is important. You cant INSULT them because they are used to all the hurt guys INSULTING them ("ahh you are nothing but a bitch!") so this rolls off their back like water off a muskrats ass. How do you SNUFF them withOUT INSULTING them? Well, let's say she has long nails which are most likely fake. Now why do 10s dress so FINE if they don't want the attention? Because they LOVE the feeling of control sometimes.

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The Fate Line is not always present in a palm.

2006-06-16T16:09:00.000+02:00

One's inspiration for life could be arising out of a strong emotional need to connect with someone, reflected by an intense heart line. The desire to live could be motivated by an urge for intellectual pursuits. This will be reflected by a strong head line more predominantly developed than either the line of life or heart. However for an individual to feel more at peace, it is best when the three major lines are equal in length and strength. This reflects that a degree of (34 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] harmony has been achieved as no one line is imbalancing the other two. If the heart line is predominant, then the sentiments will play an important role in the person's life. However, if the head line is not strong enough to keep the individual centered, the emotions may confuse, rather than inspire, the individual to express creatively. If the head line is strong but the life line is weak, there may not be enough energy to consistently endure and persist in accomplishing one's goals. Fortunately from the hand prints an analyst can recommend to an individual how to balance the energies of the major lines. If the head line is dominant then the person will need to concentrate on developing sweetness of heart. If the life line is dominant and the head and heart lines are weak, the person must find a creative outlet where they can direct their energy. A comparative analysis of the 3 major lines in both the active and inactive hands, will help the individual understand in what areas of life progress is being realized and in what other areas greater efforts have to be made. Reading the lines in general by Angela M. Mattey Whenever you look at the lines in the palm the quality of the line tells you very much about the person. Check to see if the lines are clear, deep and unbroken which means the line has good quality. If the lines are criss-crossed, chained, broken, has islands or is faintly traced it is considered to have poor quality. A poor quality line tells you that the person lacks good flow of well-being in the area that is weakened. It can represent a period of time in life when the owner is indecisive, unhappy, stressed, feeling blocked, or unable to feel secure about embracing life. Many hands have clear, unbroken lines even though the owner has had what an observer would evaluate to be a very difficult life. This means that the owner is able to survive and cope with life taking what life gives them in stride even though it may be significant challenges. There are other hands where the lines are all criss-crossed and the owner has not had that difficult a life by another's standards, but they see their life as stressful and overwhelming. The Life Line simply symbolizes the quality of a person's life force energy. The length of this line does not tell you how long a person will live (tell her that, if it appears a little short - tony). If the line is deeply etched and well formed, meaning not broken, chained or crossed, then the person is enthusiastic about life and puts effort into their actions and relationships. So the deeply etched life line tells about a good quality and supply of life force energy. If the life line is lightly traced in the palm the person tends to be more mentally oriented and observes life as a bystander with less enthusiastic involvement than the deeply etched life-lined person would exert. So the life force energy of a lightly traced or chained, or broken life line is more delicate. If the life line's pathway travels outward into the center of the palm, its owner will be more bold about life and want to explore the world. When the life line curves more closely and hugs the thumb the owner will be more likely to stay close to home and not be very adventurous about new things and changes in life. The Head Line tells about how a person's intelligence is applied, how a person thinks and to a minor degree the well-being of the physical brain. The deeper and more clear this line the more potent the thinking processes of its owner. A thin delicate, islanded, chained or frayed head line tells you that the person is nervous, anxious, sensitive and indecisive, being too easily effected by arguments and the pressures of another's idea or will power. If the head line is short, the person is more instinctive and action motivated. If the head line is longer, the person is mentally oriented, wants to learn about many things, and has good mental focus. If the head line is more straight, the person is very logical, reasoning and wants the facts. If the line is sloping downward, the person is imaginative, creative and more sensitive. When there are deep dots or dents present on this line or islands sometimes this tells of headaches and possible physical problems with the brain itself. Other times such indications tell of mental frustrations and of "second guessing" one's abilities to decide properly. The Heart Line tells about the owner's emotions and how they are expressed. The heart line can be looked at for health indications also. The heart line has a different starting point than the other palmar lines which start at the thumb side of the palm. The longer the heart line the more the emotion is present in the personality of the owner. If the heart line is straight (35 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] the owner's emotions are ruled by the mind. They think before they speak. The curved heart line, like the one shown in the above image, tells of a person who is sentimental, intuitive and openly expresses their feelings. If the heart line is clear and deep the person is comfortable with their emotions. If the line is frayed, broken, chained or delicate the person is emotionally stressed and often moody. An island on this line at about the space under the ring finger area tells of eyesight problems. The Fate Line is not always present in a palm. When it is present it helps the palmist time events in the client's life. The fate line tells all about a person's career pathway changes, independence, personal will power, and their ability to adapt to life's circumstances. If a hand does not have a fate line it is not bad like so many palmistry books have stated. It can mean the owner's life is dictated by the circumstances of their environment or by an overly possessive parent. However it can mean the owner is open minded, free wheeling and spontaneous about life and their pathway. When this line is present in it's full flow, like in the image above, the owner has a very balanced inner strength and guidance about life from within. If this line is broken it means a major life change, such as a physical move to another location, a job change, a relationship change or a complete career change, in life at the time of it's break. This is also true of a break in the life line. The Sun Line has been considered the sign of great luck and success in the hand by many palmists. This line indicates talent about which you will have to look at the rest of the hand to determine its exactitude. It basically says that its owner has a special ability to make friends, money and earn a good reputation. A full line of Sun (unlike the one in the picture) starts at the base of the palm and travels up to and under the ring finger. This is a fortunate sign of creative successes or the self-confidence to make the most of inherited talents to gain possible fame in life. The line of Sun as it is shown in the picture is how it most commonly appears in a palm. Here it is short and located in the upper part of the palm. This indicates success comes later in life and that the person might be a late bloomer. Dancing This one is tough. Ideally you should never encounter a situation where you'd have to "ask" for a dance. It is best to try any of the alternatives provided below before resorting to the demeaning and supplicating "Would you like to dance with me?". You can use Mr Smooth to start a dance with a group of girls. Or be on the dance-floor by yourself manoeuvring into position with a girl / a group of girls dancing by themselves. Or you can dance near the edge of the dance-floor and pull any girls passing by to dance with you. Or you can act like you already know the girl, take her hand, nod towards the dancfloor and say "well, come on!:)". If she seems reluctant, you go "oh, come on!:)". If she says "I'm tired", BOOM, you're in a conversation (you didn't even notice that, did you?:). "Tired? Well, not that you mention it, this place is a little crowded/noisy. Why don't we go to someplace quieter where we can talk and you can relax:)" If you let go of her hand in the meantime, grab it again and guide her to a nice and quiet little corner you've already checked out before:) Or - you can go the classic AFC way of asking a girl for a dance. If she says yes, great! If however she refuses, you're out of luck. You can try and salvage the situation by joining her for a conversation but she has refused you once already so a come-back will be that much harder to do. Or you can just move on, but remember - having other girls see you get rejected diminishes your chances with them even further. Which could result in the ultimate humiliation of moving from girl to girl and asking for a dance and being turned down all the way until you run out of girls:) Ok, the latter is unlikely, someone WILL eventually dance with you, but most probably that someone will be (yep, you guessed it:) - an UG!:) Ideally, rejection should never happen, for if you've had a chance to talk to

Many aspects of predicting the future and fortune-telling are very pattern-like

2006-06-13T17:40:00.000+02:00

Clifford continues: "Now listen for her response - one thing that may happen here and which has happened to me many times is that she may be one of those women who starts talking a lot and you won't be able to get much of what you are thinking of saying out. This is a great sign. Usually I just smile knowingly and let them talk their little hearts out. As soon as the topic of sex comes up, you know you've got her. Just lay back, be friendly, don't say too much, and she will talk herself right into your bed. You may need to invite her for a coffee or a drink at the right time (I have found a lot of the talkers will extend an invitation to you themselves and you just have to watch for it)." Even during the remote possibility, that she doesn't display immediate interest, you still have plenty of options to evoke it - eliciting values, conversing on general patterning themes or even outright patterning, displaying the general attractive traits of humour and confidence plus anything you came to know she wants in a man via eliciting values etc etc. However, even if you need a follow-up technique to continue with, thanks to your initial pacing of the ongoing reality you're well on your way to getting her to like you. And from there on to... well, whatever your goal happens to be:) I Like… You can use this as either a continuation of a conversation or as an opener. It has the two of you say what you like in turn with you directing the "conversation" from things and known concepts (movies, music, food) to situations which create different feelings and states (standing in a warm summer rain, experiencing the thrills in an amusement park) to actual descriptions of states and feelings (feeling the excitement yet safety of a joy-ride:). For example, seeing a girl in a record store in the dance music department, idly looking at records, you can start with "I like Prodigy". She'll look at you in confusion, as if trying to ask "…what?" or "…were you talking to me?". Never mind that, continue. "I like Prodigy, but I also like The Orb. Your turn:)". By now she has understood the point and will answer something like "Ok, well, I like The Chemical Brothers". Now you continue with another band, or switch to food or movies. If you say "I like The Matrix" after she said she liked the Chemical Brothers, this is obviously going to sound a little strange, so make it known to her by using a humorous tone that you know very well the switch was a little weird, but hey, you're just having fun and you're only inviting her to join:) She in turn might switch to food, follow her:) But remember - you want to end up with describing feelings and states. With the "I like" game that is, not with the girl in general:) The "I like" game is not a means to an end, what you really want to end up with is getting her excited about you, getting her phone number, having a cup of coffee, doing a *close, showing her the heaven of complete sexual satisfaction - just take your pick:) Gimmicks Starting Ross Jeffries: "Are you into metaphysics? Do you believe in astrology? Astral projection? ESP? Tarot cards? What's that you say? You think it's all a bunch of crap? Well, so do I. But guess what? Women eat this stuff up like candy, so I PRETEND to be interested in all of it!!! Of course, my favourite gimmick of gimmicks is analysing a chick's handwriting. Do I have any training in this field? Have I even read a single book on the subject? OF COURSE NOT!!! But of course, just by coincidence, we carry the good old Grapho-Deck (you can find it at www.myhandwriting.com), the world's best gimmick for picking up women. (33 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] All you need to do is walk into any bar or party with it, and corral the first girl you see. Just walk up and say, "Excuse me, I know this might sound a little odd, but do you handwrite or do you print?". After she stares at you like a bug for a second, she'll say, "Both. Why?". You say, "Well, I got this neat little deck of cards from a friend, and they're supposed to let you analyse a person's writing. I've tried it a few times and it really worked, and you looked like a fun person to break the ice with. Want to give it a go?". Almost always you'll hear yes, and the neat thing is other girls will be watching and then they'll come up to you and ask if you'll, "Do me! Do me!". I'm serious, it's that easy." Other gimmicks may include tarot cards, magic tricks and palmistry, the latter of which shall be examined a bit in this guide. Palm Reading-Why? Many aspects of predicting the future and fortune-telling are very pattern-like - they rely on creating states, leading the imagination etc. Learn what the various lines in people's palms are supposed to mean and you'll never run out of mesmerising things to say to her:) Besides, doing a palm-reading routine to a girl somewhere in public has an added bonus of a possibility of also other girls in the vicinity getting in line to extend their soft hands for you to touch and "examine":) Palm-reading (aka palmistry) can also combine patterns and kino into one truly powerful strategy. ASF: "Run the palm reader routine (you don't need to know fuck all about it). Get hold, comment on soft skin/read palm (saying stuff like you can see she's a very highly sexed, physically responsive woman - blah, blah, and really laying it on thick - with embedded commands etc. if you like). Don't let go of her hand while you're doing this, keep looking deep into her eyes then start kissing the hand & telling her some shit about 'people may know each others' mind, but they don't really know each other until their bodies get to know each other." So ok, maybe this example from ASF moved a bit too fast, but you get the general idea:) Just watch her reactions and respond accordingly. If all signs indicate that you could get away with an "until their bodies get to know each other"-line, then use it:) Here's an example of transitioning to palm-reading taken from "Eliciting values - the questions": ""How do your friends describe you?" Use this both for value-eliciting and as prep info for palm-reading, after which you can say "Let me see whether you actually are like that as well" and transition to palm-reading."" It is however good to know a few things about palmistry beforehand, for it will be far easier to "predict her future" and "look into her past" this way:) Plus your being able to show her how you draw your conclusions adds "credibility" to what you're saying:) The next few articles will explain the main lines in the hand and how to read them Reading the Lines in General The three major lines in the hand by Peter and Kathleen Keogh When you look into your hands, you will see the three major lines of heart, head, and life (see picture). The heart line shows how we feel, the head line how we think and the life line how much physical vitality we have to sustain the body. The motivation to live is not shown by the life line alone.

One of the best approaches I've ever used for meeting women is just to be incredibly direct, but also VERY low key.

2006-06-12T18:34:00.000+02:00

Stunning Approach "One of the best approaches I've ever used for meeting women is just to be incredibly direct, but also VERY low key. This combination exerts an almost HYPNOTIC fascination. So, for example, if I spot a woman I find attractive, in a low-key, but direct way, I'll walk up to her and say, "Excuse me (you're not really excusing yourself for making her feel really-really good in just a moment, you're giving her a command to stop whatever she's doing and pay attention to you, you can alternatively use "Forgive me for interrupting you" telling her to interrupt her train of thought and focus all her attention on you, seemingly in order for her to be able to determine whether or not to forgive you:), I just wanted to tell you.....(pause a second or two for effect...they will begin to wonder "what???.. what does he want to tell me?") I think you're absolutely stunning....and I really wanted to meet you. (Pause again)" ""My name's …...." I then extend my hand and shake theirs! What makes this approach work? You are being DIRECT, with no excuses or apologies. This RADIATES confidence. l It's done LOW KEY! I talk SLOWLY...no rushing....I'm radiating, affinity, warmth and relaxed power instead of need or horniness. l When you do this, it doesn't matter that a moment before she was obsessing on that overdue bill or her yeast infection. You've got her attention BIG TIME! Now you can put her on a "sense of adventure" test by using a little intrusion. What does this mean? Simply...you need to intrude SLIGHTLY...and I do mean S-L-I-G-H-T-L-Y on her personal space; not so much that she pulls back or runs or slaps you, but enough to make her wonder and get a bit excited. How do you do this? Well, when you take her hand to shake it... DON'T LET GO AFTERWARDS!!! Keep holding on as you continue to talk to her, looking straight in her eyes. Will SOME women pull their hands away? YOU BET! Maybe 30 to 40%. But never mind that. The one's that keep holding your hand for a moment longer though… have passed your "sense of adventure" test:) You have made them already slightly attracted to you in some 5 to 10 seconds from first meeting you:)" The effectiveness of this approach is however limited with mostly 7s and 8s. The really absolutely stunning women will most probably not the too phased by the "you look absolutely stunning" line. Also keep in mind, that this approach is a two-edged sword - it is powerful and direct, but it is also an obvious come-on. If she likes this approach, you've propelled yourself in her direction a great deal. If however this is not the case and she thinks you're a pathetic supplicator (depends on how you deliver it though, try to follow Ross Jeffries' suggestions of being low-key but confident and direct) then you've probably propelled yourself much more further away from her - in which case a casual "we've known forever" or a neg approach might have worked better. Have no despair though, you'll learn from experience. Update. Once again, the following is an example of major supplication and might not work on the best looking women (see "Neghits explained" for more information on that), but then again, it might, and especially as it is so quick and easy, you better use this as opposed to having done nothing at all:) The corny line approach. Speed Seduction newsletter, Ross Jeffries: "I was doing some errands in a local mini-mall when I spotted an unbelievably hot-bodied woman in tight-fitting work-out outfit. As she was leaving the yogurt place with her double combination vanilla/chocolate swirl, I said, "Excuse me, has anyone ever told you you're a shining example of physiological/genetic perfection?" Her response of course, was to laugh and say "Thank you... no, you are the (31 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] first!" I then USED her laughter response by saying, "Well, I'm glad you laughed. Because although you really are breathtaking, and I wanted to get a glimpse at the personality inside of the beauty before I introduced myself. My name is Ross". I then invited her to sit down while we enjoyed a brief hand-writing analysis. But notice here, that I mentioned and USED the fact that she laughed as a way of establishing that I was looking for MORE than her physical beauty." Pacing the Ongoing Reality A good tool to use for instant rapport, especially when approaching (as you need to overcome her possible cautiousness about you and do it fast) is pacing the ongoing reality. What this means, is describing both the very recent (for example her having been idle and you having approached her), ongoing (you talking to her and her being pleasantly surprised) and near future events (her feeling good about getting to know a handsome stranger like you) in a pleasant, humorous and believeable manner. Here's a modified example originated by Clifford in Clifford's Seductin newsletter. It starts out with some basic approaching elements (pardoning, complimenting her, offering your name), which are sometimes frowned upon by more experienced PUA-s (see "Complimenting her", "Neghits" and "Should I offer my name?" for more information on why), but the ensuing pacing of ongoing reality creates an overall pleasant atmosphere of honesty, simplicity and sincerity, which is often almost impossible to resist:) The modified example pacing by Clifford, Clifford's Seduction newsletter: "Excuse me, I don't mean to interrupt you [drinking coffee / reading the newspaper / waiting for the commuter / your train of thought], but I just wanted to tell you that I find you very attractive and wanted to meet you. My name is Rick, what's yours?" [Here comes the pacing] "You know, you never know when something wonderful is about to happen, like you could find yourself [in the cafe / in the waiting-hall / sitting on the bench / whereever] just thinking about [eating another donut / what time the commuter arrives / whatever she's doing or expecting to happen], and the next thing you know an attractive stranger is talking to you, and as you listen to him you may notice that even though [you've never seen him before / you've seen him before at this bus-stop / you've met him before here in this library], somehow today, because he is talking to you, you may see him in a new and different way. Can you imagine that?" Now what you did here, is you told her something that she invariably had to agree with - yes, she was where you said she was, doing what you told her she was doing, thinking in the lines of what you hinted she was, yes, yes and yes. And all of these things were quite simple for you to say - all you had to do was to describe the scenery:) But in her mind it doesn't matter - she finds herself agreeing to what you're saying, over and over again. And its not some unimportant who-cares and so-what stuff like "the sun is shining... and the buildings are tall... and people are walking by" either, its actually something quite important as it is about what _she_ was doing and what _she_ was thinking about. So while she is listening to you and she finds herself agreeing with you on some fairly important matters, the agreeance she has in her mind creates a feeling of enthusiasm and being close to you, and in effect - instant rapport. Having had to agree with so many things, the few things that she probably wouldn't agree with on their own, seem also much more acceptable as a consequence. So maybe she wasn't pleasantly surprised when you approached her, or maybe she wouldn't describe you as particularly handsome - but now that you've showered her with so many truisms to begin with, the ones that wouldn't ring so true by themselves seem much more true amongst all the other truisms. Thus for example you telling her she was pleasantly surprised when she thought she wasn't, will have her re-evaluate the nature of her surprise as a consequence of all the other truisms that surround it. Don't overload her mind with things that she probably wouldn't agree with though - keep a fine balance, push things in your pacing just a bit above the actual and towards the more positive, for if you go overboard, she will stop agreeing with you... and bye-bye instant rapport.

so how do you guys know each other?

2006-06-10T14:55:00.000+02:00

Her:"Well, yada,yada,yada,yada …" You: (Listens carefully looking for a follow up questions) "Really, and how did that make you feel?" Her: "Well, blah, blah …" You: (Listens carefully looking for a follow up questions) "Wow! That's a lot of work. How did you deal with it?" (Notice, i make a comment before asking her another question, so she'll know i'm listing) Her: "Well, blah, blah …" You: "That's very interesting, but I would deal with it another way." Her: "Oh really. Tell me!" You: "Well, I'd take a week end off, spend it in a hot Jacuzzi and top it off with a full body massage." Her: "Oh that sounds like so much fun. What else?" You: (Focus conversation back to her - make her talk)"Well what would you suggest?" Her: "Well, blah, blah Simple Approach An example of a simple 2-on-2 approach (ASF): "Hi... my friend isn't from here (introduce friend)... so how do you guys know each other?" You can also use this to approach a larger group. "So how does everyone know everyone else?" Yeah, that line is great... especially when the truth comes out and the guy that THOUGHT he was here on a date finds out he's only HANGING OUT with the girl he wants and she declares herself free for your picking:)" An example of a pattern-like approach (ASF): "I'm sure that you, like me, have had some really interesting experiences in your life. You know experiences that were incredibly fascinating and absorbing, like maybe when you were a kid and you went to a museum and you just got lost in wonder and delight at what you were seeing. If you were to share a memory about one of your most interesting experiences, a person you met perhaps, or a place you've been, or something you've learned that still holds a deep interest for you, what would it be?" Another pattern-like approach. Odious, ASF: ""Excuse me (to get her to stop) I just wanted to say thank you." Her curiosity bells just went DING. She'll almost inevitably ask why, though it is ok if she doesn't. Move into standard mirroring and rapport building techniques as you continue... "Have you ever had one of those days where, you find yourself feeling sort of aloof... you're not really happy, but not really sad either... you just feel like your adrift. Then suddenly you find you bump into somebody with an incredibly warm and beautiful smile that just makes you feel wonderful for the rest of the day?" She will almost surely smile more at this point, or give some degree of positive response. "So, I just had to thank you for brightening up my day... Though, you know it would be a shame if this is the last time I'll see that wonderful smile... what's (27 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] your name?"" An example of approaching girls in cafeterias with some aspects of patterning. ASF: Walk up from a direction where they can see you coming (I like them to feel like I walked up to them confidently, not like I'm trying to sneak up on them or trick them). l Sit down while you say something with a big smile and like you've known them your whole life. It doesn't much matter what you say, but if you say something interesting it makes it easier to continue the conversation (now they have had a state change and are wondering if they know you). l Make interesting conversation (use patterns if you know them) while mirroring them. Tell them a little bit about yourself then SMOOTHLY #close. l M: "So, How was you day" (sit down) H: "Good... how was yours" (This is a very typical response if you were smooth with the intro). M: "My day was awesome so far (try to match her outlook, if she looks completely down try "pretty good").I had a great day at work, and then one of my closest friends that I hadn't talked to in a while called me. You know how you can just talk to someone and no how long it's been you just _feel_ this great connection with them..." H: "That's cool, I have a friend like that" M: "Someone you can really trust, who always makes you feel good to talk to?" H: "Yeah, I've known her forever" M: ... H: ... M: "I have to go, but I've really enjoyed this conversation, why don't you give me your number and we can talk again" "How was your day", pacing and rapport building. Anubis, ASF: "If there's nothing particularly interesting about the environment in which you find yourselves, the first sentence or two gives you the perfect opportunity to pace her (this is more what I'd be tempted to do at a party or some social gathering). ----- Example 1 You walk across to her and, genuinely interested, ask: "So, how was your day?" In a fraction of a second she flickers through the events of the day, smiles, and says "Great!" Her smile is infectious and you find yours matching it as you reply. "Excellent! So was mine. What did you do?" She's had a great day. You've had a great day. She feels a small (at this stage) degree of rapport and should have little problem sharing her good mood. This leads her into talking about what she did to have such a great day, a list of sentences in which you should find any number of conversational hooks to bite on. ----- Example 2 You walk across to her and, genuinely interested, ask: "So, how was your day?" In a fraction of a second she flickers through the events of the day, sighs, and says "Awful." Her sadness is infectious and you feel an empathic frown flow across your face as you ask "Oh, what happened?"

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2006-06-10T14:51:00.000+02:00

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Groom, dress, move, and pursue like a man who is confident with women.

2006-06-10T13:52:00.000+02:00

Not in the sense of apologizing or excusing but simply that you are alert and AWARE of who she is and what she is experiencing. From here, what I will do is say, "Look...I don't have a lot of time here (a bit of a "takeaway" which always makes you more appealing). And it's obvious that you are on the move too. But if you'll sit with me for 5 minutes, I'll analyze your handwriting. You'll get to learn secrets about yourself your best friends don't know and I'll get to find out if YOU are the kind of person I want to know better (here I'm structuring an opportunity and offering her a challenge)." Power Opener The most important thing to keep in mind while approaching women is that first impressions are priceless and are made up within the first three seconds of introducing yourself. This means that you have no room for error. Rule No.1 Women sense and are turned off by insecurity, so make sure you look and act confident. How? Groom, dress, move, and pursue like a man who is confident with women. Practice socializing with all kinds of strangers on the street, whether they're old or young, women or men. Just say "Hi" and you'll start to notice your confidence build up. Rule No.2 No pickup lines. It upsets me when people ask me for the best pickup lines; there is no such thing as miracle pickup lines. You have to be honest, straightforward and say what's on your mind. If you use pickup lines, a woman will read right through you and feel cheap. When a woman feels like you're using a pickup line on her, she will do everything possible to show that she won't fall for it. Using pickup lines is what destroys a conversation because it's hard to think of what to say afterwards. Instead, by making conventional small talk, you have a base to build an interesting conversation upon. Rule No.3 Don't give her your name. This is the first tool to confirm that she is interested in you. Instead, ask for her name. Once she says her name, compliment it and start talking. If after a while she asks you for your name, it means she is interested. If she doesn't ask for your name, it means she doesn't care. If that's the case, don't waste your time with her and move on before she does. Rule No.4 No matter how tempting it might be, don't look at her breasts. If she catches you looking, gazing, screening, or scanning for even a one hundredth of a second, it's all over and you could kiss your chances goodbye. Don't risk it. Good looks are important but not enough to keep a woman interested in you. A woman also wants a man who can have an intellectual conversation. Most men know how to speak to women for the first few minutes but don't know how to make the conversation last. The most important part is how to keep them interested past the first ten minutes of conversation. The problem is that men don't understand how to follow the sequence of natural conversation. Some men make the mistake of talking about themselves all night long, while others begin by talking about how many kids they want, why they're still single, or how fast their Porsche can go from 0-60 mph. The secret to keeping a woman interested in you for more than ten minutes is to first melt her security ice shield, follow a sequence of natural small talk, bring up something no one else would, and observe her body language. Ice breakers At first, women are on their guard and act cold towards you approaching them. They feel a little intimidated so they put up their ice shields. You must deal with the fact that women will be testing you to see if you are safe or (25 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] potentially violent. Before you even try developing a conversation, you have to make her feel comfortable by showing her that you're harmless. You can do this by using a little sense of humor (without looking too weird). You can also try some ice breakers like, "this party is really exciting…" or "who's the creep that left you all alone with these men?" If she gives you the evil eye or tells you to get lost, don't feel bad (remember she might just be uncomfortable so don't take it personally). Follow through with a smile and say, "Hey, you don't need to get nasty, I was just trying to make conversation." She might smile back and apologize. If she doesn't, well hold your head up and move on. If she smiles and gives you buying signals, this means she is slowly lowering her ice shield. You can continue by asking for her name and following through with a compliment. Now you can move on to the actual conversation. Rolling your tongue the right way When you first meet a woman, you have to capture her attention and keep her interested in you. This is achieved through the art of conversation. You have to be able to roll your tongue the right way to charm her. Sample Approach You: (Approaches woman at event after receiving positive body language and successful flirting) "Hi! Do you mind if I join you?" Her: "No, not at all. Have a seat." You:"So who's the creep that left you and your sexy smile here all alone with all these men?" (Ice breaker) Her: (Laughs and starts to blush) "Actually, I came with my girlfriends just to hang out and relax a bit." You: "A devoted and hardworking woman. Now that's rare to find these days. I bet you're looking forward to your vacation?" Her: (Big smile and excited look) "Are you kidding me? I'm dying for a vacation!" You: "By the way, what's your name?" Her: "My name's Jessie." You: "That's a sweet name! Okay Jessie, if i should ask you where is your ideal vacation spot, how would you respond?" Her: "Hmm, let me think. (Touches hair, looks up, caresses her glass and then touches my arm) Somewhere hot. Anywhere, as long as there's a beach around. You: The beach? You don't look like the beach type." (Neghit) Her: (Surprised) "What do you mean, i'm not the beach type?" You: "Well you look like the type of person who'd prefer to stay in the city and do some site-seeing or visit museums." [Expanding on negative hit implying she looks boring.] :) Her: (Laughs out loud) "No way! I love the beach." (Thinks to herself: "No one has ever told me that before, they usually compliment my looks.") You: "You have an amazing laugh, I think I'm going to tell you some more jokes so I can see those gorgeous dimples again." (Two positive hits). Her: (Smiling) "Stop, you're making me laugh. By the way, you still didn't tell me your name." You: "My name's "Walter".... So what is it about your work that makes you so exhausted?" (26 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM]

2006-03-24T18:11:00.000+01:00

Many men have wasted their precious time and energy by ignoring the reality of having fallen into the LJBF zone. All in all, there is nothing you can do to change her mind. Unless... you change yourself:) Should you be able to leave your old AFC habits behind and become a man, she won't be able to hold on to her old beliefs about you. Now that you're different and can make her feel different, present yourself to her anew and watch the fireworks:) This however does not revoke the importance of a first impression. Women are used to making up their minds (about you-know-what:) according to their first impressions so changing their minds about it will be somewhat of a paradigm shift. You can make it happen, but with a considerably more effort on your part than if you had left the right impression on her the first time around (which she would have returned by leaving the right kind of impressions on you - her claw-marks on your back:). In conclusion, if you're an AFC - she will either like you or not, and there's nothing you can do about it. If you're a PUA, your options are much more varied - maybe she just didn't like the approach you used, no problem, try another one, or maybe you simply weren't at your best, next time you meet, she has a chance to reevaluate her position:) Pace and Lead An example of verbal pacing and demonstrating understanding to increase rapport (see "Mirroring" for an explanation and examples of physical pacing). Speed Seduction newsletter, Ross Jeffries: "VERBALLY PACE THE ONGOING SITUATION - I cannot emphasize enough the power of this VERY important rule. Basically, what it means is to verbally describe and therefore ACKNOWLEDGE the situation and reality that she finds herself in with you. An example: Let's say you're a lucky s.o.b., and, like me, you live right by a jog or bike path. Women are constantly skating, blading, running or biking right by you. And let's say further, that, you, like me, are a lazy son of a bitch and have no intention of moving your own fat ass via bike, blades, running etc. What do you have to do in order to meet and talk to these women? Well, Buckwheat, what ya first and foremost gotta do is... Ya Gotta Get 'Em To Stop! With that in mind, I have actually USED the following approach and ACTUALLY gotten it to work! I merely wait for a nice looking young lady to come jogging, blading or biking toward my stationary position along the path. I then jump out, hold out a hand and in my most authoratative tone yell: STOP! (This is actually pretty funny to watch. I have never had them NOT stop!) I then say something like, "If you're that easily stopped... you need a boyfriend who will MOTIVATE you! My name is Ross". In the example above, where I've just jumped in her path and yelled "STOP", what do you think this girl is thinking? It's a safe bet it is something along the lines of "this guy is fuckin' nuts"! So I better USE that instead of ignoring it. I say something along these lines, "Look, I know this is a totally nutty way to meet someone (pacing her ongoing belief)... but I knew if I didn't do SOMETHING to stop you, we'd never get a chance to talk (also completely true... a truism with which she cannot argue) and maybe see how much WE COULD REALLY LIKE EACH OTHER (embedded suggestion)". The principle here is VERY important. And that is... BY DEMONSTRATING UNDERSTANDING, YOU INCREASE RAPPORT! Now, let me make something critically clear: I did NOT say demonstrate that YOU are "understanding, sensitive" etc. I said demonstrate

2006-03-23T20:57:00.000+01:00

Many women don't trust their friends probably because they are just as cunning as themselves. So they look to the arms of a man for this." Guidelines in Approaching Use humour to get you started - or even give you a head-start:) Ross Jeffries: "Let's talk about using humour for a minute. Not only do most women LOVE a guy who can make them laugh; laughing shifts a woman's physiology and mental focus, interrupting her thought patterns and creating a temporary blank, which YOU can then fill in. Just think about it a second. Have you ever been in a rotten mood, and then a friend suddenly makes you laugh? What happens? You start feeling a hell of a lot better, don't you?" What Ross Jeffries suggests as an almost perfect approach is using a humorous comment to get her to laugh, then all you have to do is to follow up with anything to keep the conversation flowing towards a possibly pattern-like talk, eliciting values or any other technique described in this guide you have chosen to use. You can even border on slightly negging her, if you go Mystery-style with a drop-dead gorgeous girl, or smutty, if you go GM-style, but those two are already more advanced techniques. If however you are dealing with a nice and cute (of 7 or 8 on a scale of 10), you can also make her feel good by complimenting her looks for starters (see Negging for why this is not such a good idea with a drop-dead gorgeous model-type babe of 10). Update. Speed Seduction newsletter, Ross Jeffries: "For me, one of my favorite ways to meet women is to use some type of humorous approach that gets her laughing. Why is this so important? Laughter sets a woman at ease and puts her off guard. 1. Getting her laughing shows that you are confident and don't take the process of meeting her too seriously, unlike a desperate hard-up loser HAS to succeed, YOU are a fun guy, enjoying your exciting life and creating an opportunity for HER to step into it and have some fun too?IF she plays her cards right. 2. Humor is a way to test to see if SHE has a personality. If she is a mean, unhappy be-yatch, why bother? 3. MOST IMPORTANTLY, LAUGHTER GIVES YOU A BEHAVIORAL RESPONSE from her that you can mention, incorporate, and future pace into HER IMAGINING CONTINUING TO HAVE FUN WITH YOU LATER! 4. Offer entertainment and confidence with speed. ASF: "As far as you are concerned the girl has to be entertained by you. If she sees other guys as being more confident and more entertaining she most certainly will excuse herself to the bathroom or the bar to hook up with them later. That's why its important to work quickly so that you do not take more time than is necessary to secure a chick (take her home or spend some quality KINO time with her on the couch/dancefloor somewhere). Getting numbers on their own is unreliable." The 3 steps of approaching. ASF: (22 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] BEGINNING - preparation ... clothing, props, initiate an entertaining and interactive conversation (that is what an OPENER is all about). MIDDLE - using entertaining stories and routines, you convey the humour, confidence and the other typical attractive traits, use NEGS to make them chase you, test them (stop conversation to see if they reinitiate it) and look for the indicators to see if closing is worth doing (like KINO, position and body language, laughter, etc), usually 3 positive indicators. END - close or eject based on the indicators. Closing will stall when you don't realise that you will succeed with the close if you have witnessed 3 positive indicators. Decide on either the *close or the #close. If pressed for time, just #close... but try to kiss her goodbye on the LIPS if you have a little time, always KISS CLOSE. Demonstrate Value and Personality You have nothing, absolutely nothing to expect from a girl to whom you do not demonstrate value and personality. Be it being Mr Smooth or making her horny with GM or leading her imagination with patterning or simply being you in a great mood, confident and witty which she finds attractive - you have to demonstrate her something about you that she discovers to be of value for her. And she will discover it being of value for her for the simple reason of liking the way that value makes her feel. So many guys think, that their mere presence and company is of some specific value to the girl - well it is not. If you sport a great face and/or big muscles, then your presence can sometimes be a turn-on for a girl - she likes the way the proximity of your face and muscles make her feel and thus your presence can be of separate value for her. But even the few times that happens, it will wear off fast if it turns out that that is all you have to offer. Any time the girl is bored, disinterested, turns you down, walks away, rejects you or ignores you - you have simply not demonstrated enough value to her. Demonstrating the right kind of value and personality, the kind that she is especially looking for in a partner is not an issue at this point, you'll get to that when Eliciting values. Right now you simply need to get her attention by taking an educated guess at what she might be interested in - see Good traits to have and develop. Demonstrating any kind of value and personality from that list of traits will do perfectly fine for starters, and is infinitely better than the "Here I am, this is the way I look (and I'm sorry I'm not better-looking), now please like me" attitude used by most guys (who are also "trying" to be funny and confident etc, but eventually their AFC'ness will inevitably shine through:). Which will leave them scratching their heads while the girl walks away and thinking "oh, better luck next time, I'm sure someone somewhere will like me... I hope". In fact, you are like a travelling salesman, giving girls only a foretaste of the goods and offering them an opportunity to get the real stuff... "if they behave well enough":) See the difference with AFC thinking? Which seems to consider that the girls are the "goods" which you might eventually get if you date, pay for dinners/movies and take their disrespect long enough? No, YOU are the goods, but you're not selling to everyone - you offer only to a select group of potential customers. But you don't need to push it, the stuff is for real and you know it, and if one customer doesn't want it, its her loss, another one will grab you gladly:) Just don't forget - nobody will want your goods if they don't even know anything about it. So sample it - by demonstrating value and personality. First Impressions In general, a woman makes a decision about whether or not she would like to sleep with a man very early during a first encounter. That is why acting like a desperate and horny or a simply nice and wimpy AFC yields you nothing. Ever. Including later:) And if a woman has decided that she is not interested in sleeping with you, no amount of pursuit or persuasion is going

2006-03-22T17:38:00.000+01:00

Approaching To Keep Them Interested If She Seems Unapproachable Often the single woman is very lonely. Not many guys ask particular women on dates and when they are asked they will take advantage of it even if you are not her automatic knight in shining armour. You have to understand that even though many women receive attention constantly, they do not actually get asked out on dates. This can be for many reasons and the initial one to come to mind is that all of the guys thought she would say "no". They may think she is too good for them and she may not come accross as the approachable type. Have you ever met someone and they ended up being a lot nicer than what your impression of them was? People carry around themselves an aura of "leave me alone" or "I'll bite your head off" type barrier. You only have to break this shield and you are half-way there to getting the woman you desire. Within seconds of asking a woman on a date she can actually change her opinion of you. This is luckily favouring you. She is suddenly thinking of you as a possible mate whereas before you were just another guy to her. The planting of the interest from you into the woman's brain is an extremely important move in catching the women you want. She is now thinking about you in this way. Have you ever had a woman show interest in you and then suddenly you like her more than you did before? Well now you are adding up the minuses and plusses to getting further involved with this woman. You must put yourself into their thoughts to give yourself a chance! Many girls want to have dates arranged so your approach is welcomed and sometimes even wished for. Maybe all of her friends are in relationships and she doesn't have a lot of choices with whom to go out with. Or have you ever thought the woman you are thinking about asking on a date really wants you badly? She only needs to be slightly attracted to you and you will get her on a date by asking with confidence and not taking no for an answer. This is even if she plays hard to get. She may even mean no to start with and some gentle persuasion will talk her into it." More reasons to not perceive her as unapproachable by Johnny Shack: "Its romantic for a woman being asked on a date. They love romance! Women want a mate and you may be the one they are after. Most women will try different models before they settle down to have babies and you should be in the showroom at least offering a test drive. All girls dream of their wedding day and the last thing they want is to be left on the shelf. They are searching as hard as you are guys! Women want someone to kiss and to hold. Someone to have coffee with and to go to the pictures or to see a show with. They feel horrible if they don't have anyone. Many women think: "If only a decent guy would come along. Thats all I ask for". Some even cry themselves to sleep wishing to meet this guy and to at least have the opportunity to sort through their dates to find one. They know that without dating this can't happen. Also, there is something very exciting about going out with a stranger that you just met. It's an air of "anything could happen" that strongly helps to alter a girls mood and make her susceptible to doing things she normally wouldn't. They want a guy to replace their father. Think of it guys: many men want the woman they catch to somehow replace that motherly love you left behind when you moved away from home. Women want someone to share there

2006-03-21T17:16:00.000+01:00

as quickly as people usually do. When meeting girls you already know, shaking hands might seem strange, so giving some sort of a hug is the way to go. You don't need to fall all over her to give her a hug (which depending on the situation might even make you look like a fool or a pervert or make her embarrassed instead of having her enjoy it too:), a hug can also be putting your arm around her waist or shoulders when standing to her left or right and pulling her closer for a moment, or taking her hand for a moment (but not shaking it), or her elbow, or arm etc. Daniel, ASF: "KINO on the arm/hand as soon as you say hi to show her you are a sexual being." Update. Set the mood of the date from the start. When going on a date/get-together, establish the mood immediately. You can of course change the mood from "polite and calm" to "warm and friendly" to "aroused and sweaty" during the course of the meeting, but why go the hard way, if you can jump right into "warm and friendly" or beyond in the first place. It is best to have acting enthusiastic upon meeting the girl to have agreed upon previously (most probably when you set up a meeting on the phone, see Refining the close in Closing for more information). But even without that, you can be all smiles when you meet her, give her a big hug right away, try to take and hold her hand all the way to whereever it is that you'll be going and watch her change from slightly nervous to happy, smiling, starry-eyed and glowing all over:) And remember - enthusiasm is contageous:) Update. Foot-flirting. You've all seen it done in the movies:) The foot looses the shoe and the woman is stroking the man with her bare foot or vice versa. Corny you say:)? A cliche maybe:)? Try it and then see what you think:) am, ASF: "[in response to "you can't kino sitting across the table"] Actually, you _can_ kino when you are sitting across from the target. Just use your feet! Of course this requires a small table, but this also helps to set up an intimate atmoshpere (remember candles etc.). Touch her feet "occasionally" with your own under the table, say something like "tee hee, you are foot-flirtin' with me?" in a joking way. Look her deepely in the eyes while doing this, and continue using your feet. Do it the right way and at the right time with a chick in the right mood, and voila! You can actually proceed to rubbing each other's crotches with your toes under the table, then say "my bed is that way" and BANG! You're IN!" Update. "Can't hear you:)". LordGaeden, ASF: "Try this: If she says something, lean forward as if you aren't hearing her very well, and touch her (arm or back). Then lean back again and answer. Are there any easy clues as to when is the right time to go kino? The clue is when it's possible (ie, she's within in range)". Update. Kino is the difference between getting and not getting the girl. It is the saving grace of even the otherwise doomed "nice guy" approach. And in some instances, being the "nice guy" together with using kino can even be quite effective. Here's why: the success of kino depends on whether the girl perceives you and your touch as a threat to her or not. You can be a rough and tough guy (I try to avoid the word "jerk" as it is not really quite reprsesentative of what the opposite of "nice guy" actually is) and still have the girl feel you are not a threat to her speficically, thus initiating kino will be easy. A nice guy usually just has an easier time having girls feel he is not a threat to them. Usually though, that is also his undoing, as he is consequently perceived as weak, neutral and non-sexual, all of which are major turn-offs for girls. But here is where the saving grace of kino steps in. You are safe, so touching and hugging with you is... well, also safe. However, before she knows it - touching and hugging with you moves from feeling pretty good to quite exciting to really electrifying until all that good, safe and friendly physical contact with you is going to make her wonder: "If it feels so good just to touch with him, why on earth not do more? I wonder what that would be like?". Which is not to say that being the "nice guy" is the way to go. This was simply meant to illustrate the strength of kinaesthetics - it even works for the "nice guy":) So remember - kino really is the difference between getting and not getting the girl. Update. The protective gesture. Maxim (http://maximmag.com): "In a crowded bar, if people are walking by and pushing you, there’s a way a guy can put his arm around you—not actually touching you, but behind your back so he’s sort of keeping you from getting shoved. A man doesn’t need to pick a fight with some guy who accidentally steps on my toes, but it’s nice if he’s protective. —Kris, 27, Los Angeles"

2006-03-20T18:19:00.000+01:00

Another more advanced aspect, although controversial as to the effectiveness of it, is mirroring her blinking her eyes and breathing. Being able to mirror her breathing and blinking her eyes is supposed to create an even deeper rapport, but first of all - trying to see when she breathes might seem like you staring at her breasts (and you would NEVER do that, would you?:); and secondly - all the concentration required to detect and match your breathing and blinking with hers will take away much-needed attention from what she is saying, how is she responding to your patterns, values, kino etc, so eventually this could do more harm than good. As to from where to mirror - the most common situation is when you're talking to her. But you can also try mirroring from a distance, say in a classroom, meeting, night-club or cafeteria, just make sure she has a chance to subconsciously detect you mirroring her, in other words, she must be able to see you (so you can forget about mirroring her while watching her take a shower through a peep-hole:). Kinesthetics Psychological studies show that casual touching during a friendly conversation causes people to remember the conversation more fondly after the fact. The combination of kino with social proof is dynamite. Touch one girl and the other girls seeing this think its normal or even "good" to be touchy-feely with you:). Now you can quite naturally move on to touching those other girls and so forth:). ASF: "It's quite simple - hug them, touch their hand sporadically and in A NON THREATENING WAY, that is, not like the desperate pervert we all are:) So the idea is, you hide completely the interest you might have AND at the same time you act really touchy/huggish. The problem is - you have to start this early in the "friend" relationship, it has to seem natural, or otherwise she'll wonder "what the fuck is he doing lately?":) Once you've developed that kind of flirtatious friendship, it's easy to spawn other such 'friendships' with other women: they will see you being close to another woman, and I think the key here is that, it probably does not trigger as much jealousy as it makes them (the "new" ones) feel comfortable -- they see another woman being touched by you in a non-threatening way, and, blam, social-proof, it becomes a 'proof' to them that it's normal for you to touch them in turn... " ASF: "Ok, I use this all the time now. TOUCH HER!!! It doesn't matter if you just met her. Hold her hand, rub her arm, her elbow her back, her shoulders, her hair, her face. TOUCH HER !!!" ASF: 1. PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE RESPONDS TO YOU!!! 2. PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE RESPONDS TO YOU!!! 3. One more time: PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE RESPONDS TO YOU !!! If you do this you will be able to better gauge if you have the appropriate rapport to invite a kiss. If her body seems to respond to the non-sexual touching then get gradually more sexual. For women some areas of the body outside of the primary erogenous zones are intimate: Palms, inside the elbow, ear lobes, cheeks, the hips were the waist meets the hips, between the fingers.... 4. Last thing: PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE RESPONDS TO YOU!!! Update. Do the things that lovers do - brush off "something" that's stuck in her hair, gently stroke her cheek pretending to wipe off an eyelash etc. These are the types of things lovers do and by doing them, you will make her feel (doesn't even matter if only subconsciously) like you were her lover. Plus you'll get "innocent" yet pleasurable kino:) Update. Kino as soon as you meet a girl. Meeting someone for the first time is an excellent chance for starting kino - shaking hands when exchanging names is a tradition of many cultures and cultures. But make sure you hold on to her hand longer than expected, long enough for you to enjoy it and her to notice, if not you enjoying it but at least you not letting go

2006-03-18T12:31:00.000+01:00

KEEP TALKING Alert, energetic Pupils dilated Gradually opens posture Lowers drink Touches self gently Caresses objects Crosses and uncrosses legs Flashes of palm Crossed legs steady Dangles shoe on toe Hands never touch face Touches you any reason Feet firmly on floor Loosens anything Leans forward Steady hands, feet MOVE ON Tense, restless Normal or small pupils Posture remains closed Keeps drink high Grips or pinches self Squeezes, taps objects Legs remain crossed Back of hand gestures Swings crossed legs Keeps shoe on Touches face Never touches you Feet on edges or toes Tightens anything Leans away Tapping, drumming In social settings, most of us start out in a closed, defensive posture because we're a bit apprehensive. A closed posture feels safe. When the person you are talking with shifts to a more open posture, it signifies trust and comfort. That person is, literally, opening up to you and what you have to offer. It takes courage to open up to the other person. If you go first, she, or he, will usually follow your move from closed to slightly more open. Open up in, slow, gradual shifts of posture. Mirroring A variation of mirroring is discussed in the articles dealing with eliciting values and using trance-words - that is verbal mirroring. But a better-known variation of mirroring is physical mirroring. Actually, you've most probably been doing it all your life without knowing it but once you know how to harness the power of mirroring consciously - its like young Skywalker recognising and harnessing the power of the Force:). Notice how people that seem to be engaged in ann interesting conversation - they are excited about what they themselves are saying, they are about to say and what the other is saying, in other words, they have rapport - seem to take the same poses, whether sitting or standing up. When sitting, either side by side or on opposites sides of the table - one leans forward and then the other leans forward as well, one leans backward and then the other (17 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] leans backward as well, they cross their hands in the same manner, tilt their heads similarly, seem to be having similar side-activities (one playing with his keychain, the other with her pen), etc etc. Are they directing their actions consciously? No, all their energies and concentration is on the discussion, everything else happens subconsciously. But actually, they don't even have to be having a discussion, they may just both be thinking their own thoughts… and still you can see mirroring going on - they make the same movements almost the same time without seemingly without having any perceivable interaction with the other person. What is all this knowledge good for? Well, mirroring can be used as a tool for building rapport. Being similar or having someone similar in your vicinity creates a feeling of ease, comfort, being understood, protected (should there appear a threat of any sort, there's two of you now:) etc. So you can use the power of mirroring to create these feelings in the one you are mirroring, she'll subconsciously link all those feelings to you (after all, you are the one mirroring her:) and rapport is going to develop between you without you having lifted a finger (unless she lifted a finger and you had to mirror her:). How, whom and from where should I mirror? Whom - that's easy, the girl you want of course:) How - assuming the same posture, doing the same movements with your hands, in all respects using your body in a similar fashion to hers. More aspects of mirroring are: following - doing the movements after she did them. Note that although your mind screams "This is stupid! I'm going to get caught! She MUST see me doing the same movements! This is ridiculous!", don't' listen to it, fight it, it is the voice of the Dark Side!:) Why? Because they NEVER NOTICE it! Instead, they feel more comfortable and relaxed in connection with you, and eventually (that's why you even bothered, right?:) - more drawn to you. l pacing - doing the movements the same time with her. Yes. Sounds impossible? Well it isn't. Have you ever noticed how you sometimes happened to do the same things at exactly the same time with another person. Maybe yawn and then have a laugh about it:)? Because you thought it was accidental? Well it wasn't, you had reached the second stage of mirroring:) (Yawning is not a good example though, the last thing you want is the girl yawning with you:). But there's nothing magical all supernatural about doing the movements at the same time, because essentially the second phase is a stage of transition between the first and the third. In mirroring there's always a leader and a follower. So far she has been leading you (because you've been following her) but now you are coming to the stage when YOU will be leading her! And the inevitable stage between following and leading is pacing - you are doing movements simultaneously. l leading - if you've done your mirroring right, have followed and paced, then you are ready for a revelation. You can lead! Try it. Cough. She coughs. Scratch your elbow. Well maybe she'll scratch her shoulder instead of her elbow, big deal:) In addition to being a tool of building rapport, you can lead her into doing some pretty fun stuff. Do a movement with your hands mimicking the parting of legs (this should be associated with something you are talking about, if it looks strange, she'll notice it and you don't want her conscious attention on your movements, keep her mind busy with what you're talking about). Watch her legs part:) Have fun:)

2006-03-17T17:37:00.000+01:00

In a crowd she speaks only to you and focuses all of her undivided attention on you. m Micellaneous: She mirrors your body language and body positions. l Her skin tone becomes red while being around you. l She blows smoke straight out from between her lips and toward you. l She leans over and speaks into her friend's ear, just like in junior high school. l She is standing with her head cocked slightly at an angle, one foot behind the other, hips slightly thrust forward. l At a party - every once in a while she seems to appear out of nowhere in your vicinity and if you move to another spot, soon she appears out of nowhere again, you catch her glancing in your general direction (actually, glancing at YOU dummy!:), she bumps into you… accidentally, touches you… accidentally etc:) l When talking to a girl, these are some of the more important signs to watch for: l Can you keep conversation going with her? l Does she react well to kino? l Does she touch you? l Does she laugh? Now I don't have to explain what the answer "yes" to these questions means, do I:) From "Sweep women off their feet...": "All these signs usually tell you that the girl is captivated by your charms. But before you get there, chances are that her body language changes as the discussion progresses. Make sure that you watch her closely and as soon as you get a sign that should be an indication that you are on the right track, keep going in that direction. If the opposite happens, just change the subject and see what happens." Update. The really gorgeous and beautiful girls however very seldom get around to displaying the signs of interest described above. They simply don't have to, as they are used to getting some attention already long before that. With such girls you have to be on a lookout for the initial and thus much more subtle signs of interest. One example of this would be a gorgeous girl simply looking at your face. Obviously people tend to look at what or whom they like to look at. But whereas an average girl first just looks at your face and then progresses into the more overt signs of interest described above, looking at your face from time to time might be the only sign of interest you'll ever get from the most beautiful of girls. So if you think you're not getting any signs of interest from beautiful girls - you are, but you just can't see them well enough yet. Update. Don Steele: "Here are signs of interest sent from across the room. Most are applicable to both sexes. The sequence of the list approximates the courtship sequence. (15 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] I'M INTERESTED Sidelong glance(s) Looks at you a few times Holds your gaze briefly Downcast eyes, then away Posture changes to alert Preens, adjusts hair, attire Turns body toward you Tilts head Narrows eyes slightly Smiles Matches your posture Eyes sparkle Licks her lips Thrusts breasts DON'T BOTHER ME Never sneaks a peek Fleeting eye contact Looks away quickly Looks away, eyes level Posture unchanged Does no preening Turns body away Head remains vertical Eyes remain normal Neutral, polite face Posture unchanged Normal or dull eyes Keeps mouth closed Sags to de-emphasize breasts In Summary. Frequency of eye contact, the more the better. Amount of time she, or he, holds your gaze, the longer the better. How she breaks off eye contact, down before away is great! Shine of the eyes, the brighter the better. Direction of body, toward you, good, away, bad. Overall posture, erect and alert are good. Tilt of head, vertical is bad, increased tilt is great. Where the drink is held, high in front as a barrier, that's bad. Hand activity, clenched, squeezing or pinching is bad, open, caressing or stroking is great. Most of us are slightly afraid as well as somewhat excited in settings where social interaction is expected and required. So, most people do not sit or stand in an open posture. But, during courtship, the more open the other person's posture is, the more open that person is to you and your advances. And, the more open you are, the more likely the other person is to open up to you. First Conversation Signals. Men, pay attention to all the ways she communicates during the first few minutes as you talk with her.

2006-03-13T17:22:00.000+01:00

She wets her lips, some women use only a single-lip lick, wetting the upper or lower lip, while others run the tongue around the entire lip area. m m She puts her fingernail between her teeth. She protrudes her lips and thrust her breasts forward. m Her eyes: She gazes in your eyes with deep interest and her pupils are dilated. m She raises both eyebrows exaggeratedly for a couple of seconds, this is often combined with a smile and some eye contact. m She winks at you while talking to you or winks at you from a distance. m While talking to you, she blinks more than usual, fluttering her eyelashes. m Eyebrows raised and then lowered, then a smile indicates interest in you. m Her hair: (13 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] She pushes her fingers through her hair. This can be one hand movement or more of a stroking motion. m She twirls her hair around her fingers while she is looking at you. m m She is throwing her hair back off her shoulders. Her clothing: If she is wearing clothes that show her nipples underneath and you notice they are getting perky and erect. m m The hem goes up to expose a little more leg. She is fixing, patting or smoothing her outfit to make herself look better. m While she is seated: She moves in time to the music, with her eyes on you. m She starts sitting straight up and her muscles appear to be firm. m m She is sitting with her legs open. She sits with her legs crossed in a manner to reveal her thigh. m m Her legs are rubbing against each other. m Her legs are rubbing against the leg of the table. Her crossed leg is pointed towards you or if that same leg is rocking back and forth towards you. m Her hands: m She exposes the palms of her hand facing you. While talking to you, she rests an elbow in the palm of one hand, while holding out her other hand, palm up. m m She rubs her wrists up and down. She sits with one hand touching one of her breasts. m She rubs her chin or touches her cheek. This indicates that she's thinking about you and her relating in some way:) m She is fondling keys, sliding hands up and down a glass, playing with toys or other things on the table. m She plays with her jewellery, especially with stroking and pulling motions. m She touches your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand while talking to you (in case you already haven't started kino yourself, dumbass:). m She is pretending to look at her watch as you pass her. m Her voice She raises or lowers the volume of her voice to match yours. m She speeds up or slows down her speaking to match yours. m m She laughs in unison with you.

2006-03-10T17:14:00.000+01:00

It's a good intro, or it can be used right after an opening line. I've used it several times to great effect, as the line usually gets women talking about how they got to the party, or what they do for a living, or about how they know the host, or why they chose to strip for a living. I learn a lot by paying attention to the subject matter of their answer. If it's about what they do for a living, then you know that's something important to them ... rapport material handed on a platter. If the woman doesn't mind sharing personal things about herself with you, this opening gives her the perfect opportunity, while at the same time allowing those women who are more reserved a chance to come up with something more benign, like "I'm a friend of the host." If they respond by not answering or looking dazed and confused or by saying that question makes them uncomfortable, I move on to someone else. People like that are no fun anyway, no matter how beautiful they may appear. Always be prepared to mirror the statements they give you ... if they reveal something personal about themselves, you can reveal something that's personal to you .. perhaps not the same thing, but something similar. This will feed the rapport between you as a relationship begins to develop. (This is also a good time to start your patterning language, if you don't do it naturally and turn it on or off as needed.) Also, if things aren't progressing so well with one person, remember that mingling means moving around ... don't stay with one person so long, otherwise you're not mingling. You can always return later. You can use the "story" approach not only with the person, but with accessories or special clothing the woman is wearing: examining a beautiful necklace, you can ask "so, what's the story behind the necklace?" The story approach doesn't work with un-special clothing: "So, what's the story behind those Levi's?" doesn't work as well as "So, what's the story behind that gorgeous hand-knit scarf?"" Don'ts of Fluff Talk (Originated by Don Diebel) Do not talk about any of your personal (family, work, money) problems. l l Don't act desperate. Don't talk about anything negative at all. Keep everything you talk about upbeat and positive. l Don't get drunk. This really turns women off and makes a bad impression. Don't drink at all or limit your drinking to a couple of drinks. l l Don't try to analyse her problems. Don't bitch about your previous girlfriends or ex-wives on how they mistreated you, dumped you, cheated on you, took you to the cleaners on child support, etc. l (12 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] Don't pretend to be funny or humorous. If you are putting on an act, it will come across to her as phoney. Just be friendly and smile (but in appropriate doses, avoid having a grin on your face ALL THE TIME, guys that are smiling for hours in a row look terribly insecure and just plain pathetic). l l Don't focus on your health problems or ailments. Don't brag about yourself and your accomplishments. There are exceptions though, but try to be careful about them. If you really have something impressive to talk about, you can let her in on it, just try to be real casual about it. On the whole, women are very good at sniffing out when the male is trying to impress them by bragging. And if what he is bragging about is not really that impressive, it's a complete turn-off. So be careful. Focusing on her and her interests is a far safer route to take. l And at all costs, avoid these three themes: politics, religion and conspiracy theories. These are guaranteed to nuke your otherwise wonderful interaction. l Body Language Reading Doesn't matter whether she is interested in you, you'll make her interested eventually anyway:) But look for these signs to show you whether you're already making progress:) It's also fun to look for these signs as a by-stander, either in everyday situations or for example in a bar - when the guy earnestly believes he is being sooo smooth but the woman he is talking to isn't displaying any of the signs presented below, you can't help but have a chuckle about it:) Her lips: Big smiles with upper and lower teeth showing with a relaxed face. m Biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, licking her lips or touching of her front teeth. m

2006-03-09T18:11:00.000+01:00

In order for her to feel understood, you need to listen to what she says, rephrase it and feed it back to her (it helps if you agree with whatever statement she made:). Listen to what she says, remember it and you can make her feel connected to you and understood by you even weeks after your conversation by just simply repeating what she told to you during your conversation:) So make sure a lot of your communication to her is a subtle echo of what she feeds you. Now this (10 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] strategy is already quite effective on its own but combine it with using trance-words and she's gonna levitate right in front of your eyes:) ASF: "You need to do more than just agree with her...going uh uh won't cut it. However you also can't just repeat what she said verbatim. You have to take something she's said and paraphrase it and present it as an original thought or opinion." Fluff Talk Fluff talk is an important part of approaching a girl, especially if you plan to lauch into patterns, which you can't begin the conversation with on their own. Fluff talk is also needed, if you plan to continue with eliciting values - you must have had at least some sort of a casual conversation with the girl, for then it would sound only natural for you to have become a little more interested in her, to the point of asking all sorts of questions:) The number one rule of fluff talk is - direct the conversation towards and talk about FEELINGS. What fluff talk usually ends up being is an exchange of facts - "where ya goin?", "whatcha doin?", "what did you do today/yesterday?", "oh that's interesting". Facts are a BORE! Giving you her facts makes her feel NOTHING. Neither has she any use for the facts you are giving her. So grab any opportunity you have to get to feelings! "So what did you do yesterday?" "Oh I went skating" "You like skating?" "Yes:)" "Makes you feel good?:)" "Yeah:)" "I know what you mean..." And you go on to describe skating as the most liberating, beautiful, earth-shattering experience (that's what making up patterns on the fly is all about:). Or have her describe you her feelings herself, if she is a talker. Voila - you've switched from fluff talk to patterning in a blink of an eye:) She feels enthralled. But you don't know how to follow up on that. So let the the fluff talk continue. "So... em... have you eaten anything today?" "Yea, some sandwitches in the morning. Why?" "Well I was just hoping to pick up on some tips on how to have a delicious breakfast without having to spend too much time making it:) So you like sandwitches?" "Um... not really:) I just don't have time for much anything else:)" "But if you did, let's say you had your own personal cook, what would you like to start your morning with?" "Oh, well (salivating:), fried eggs and bacon, and a large cup of hot chocolate, and some marmalade (etc, let her describe it to her heart's content:)" "Ah, that would really feel good wouldn´t it? Still lazily laying in your bed, to have all that delicious food brought to you on a silver tray - you take a sip of cocoa and can feel the pleasant warmth of it spreading thorughout your body, which after a good-night's sleep is more fresh and receptive to the pleasentness of that feeling than usual, and you take a taste of marmalade and can feel it melting in your mouth and the sweetness of it waking you up for yet another wondeful day (etc, now make good use of all the food she HERSELF told you she likes:)" (11 of 84) [7/5/2001 8:02:27 PM] Once again - fluff talk to pattern talk in no time:) So the ability to fluff talk is essential, but not any kind of fluff talk will do. She can exchange facts with a million guys and not feel a thing. Or, she can give her facts to you and get a wonderful return on it:) But remember - FEELINGS:) Update. "So, what's *your* story?" A less feelings oriented and a more free-flowing approach to fluff-talk. By James L. King III, ASF: ""So, what's *your* story?" - this is wonderful question that will get the other party talking.